BPD Awareness Month (Personality)

Now todays topic is a rather potent topic within BPD has it suggests with todays topic being ‘Personality’ & BPD is Borderline Personality Disorder. So this topic is rather critical towards BPD in all senses. Iv done a blog many months ago titled ‘What is Borderline Personality Disorder’ Which I cover BPD in detail, this blog will be slightly different but I will cover BPD too, But this blog will be directly talking about Personality il be giving you some clinical information relating to BPD also so everything is covered has best has I can attempt.

So personality where do I begin, lets try at birth/small ages where your personality begins to take shape, many well sourced documents will tell you our personality is formed from our life experiences and through our upbringing and through our way of life, if you have a stable or unstable family home, weather your wealthy or poor or in between, also from how you are character wise weather you have an outspoken personality or weather your quiet timid & shy. All these things do shape our personality for later in life, they take place at such early ages where most of us will have our own personality TRAITS and most of us will be on the thought process like, iv always been like such and such and you have no memory of when it kicked in or anything relating to that thing, other than the fact you are like it and you’ve always been like it, example iv always been a Formula one fan from early ages, I have ZERO memory of watching this the 1st time and I have zero memory of when I began to enjoy it, all I know is I love and iv always loved it has far back has I can remember, its them sort of things that shape our entire personality, ranging from deep emotional states to behaviour to sports to foods you name it, its all developed at early ages where most of us have no idea why we like or why we are the way we are, all we know is that’s who we are. Your Personality is really out of your control, its like Love we cannot control who we fall in love with, we have ZERO control over that, just like with our personality we have ZERO control over it, now later in life we can learn new skills to adapt to our personality, but the fundamentals of our personality are really set in stone. Now I’m not including things like racial hatred or homophobic attitudes in this topic because them 2 things are a education based thing, if your raised in either a racist home or a homophobic environment of course it will affect your personality, but through education you can erase traits to them and build something new, Now things like relating to our personality things like you like the colour purple since you was a baby and you continue to like the colour purple, there is NO education based training needed there because its has simple has 1,2,3. Now I may of gone a little deep into that just then but I wanted to express somethings in our personality’s we can change through education and most things are ingrained in our DNA forever. Things that education can change is just a factor of life, but our main personality traits generally stay the same, in my opinion. Also the reason I chose Race & Homophobia has 2 topics of education is because no matter where you are in the world weather you fit into them 2 things or not its irrelevant, I chose them 2 things because we all have seen or experienced these things in our life’s, and its been proven that with education peoples opinions of these 2 things can change rapidly. So that’s why I chose them 2 very sensitive things. No offense meant if I offended anyone.

Now iv spoken about our personality being set in stone throughout our small ages now trying to add another layer onto this is to add the BPD to this, How the hell does one cope with all that iv just spoken about adapting to your own ways is sometimes difficult because your body may like waking up at 7am but you, YOU are like I hate you Mr.7am alarm lol. So BPD thrown into the mix is pretty much like a monkey wrench it throws everything into a big mess and jams a lot of progress which then makes adapting to your own things that much harder, because now you have you, your personality and the BPD symptoms and the BPD traits and personality to throw you right off guard. Leaving you feeling quiet helpless.

I often make the distinction between My Personality & BPD personality, there is me and there is it. There is a massive difference between the 2, because you may be a loving, caring, honest person and the BPD personality is everything opposite and destructive, so learning to cope between the 2, takes many years to learn to do this, when I was first aware I had another personality lets say just for arguments sake iv NOT GOT (Split personality) that is a total different diagnosis, I’m just using this language for arguments sake, the age 7 is when I became aware there was another personality that wasn’t mine or anything like me, I’m now 28 this year, so its taken me 20 years to learn the difference between the 2, also through much therapy, which has been painstaking. But there is a difference between the 2 personality’s and being able to adjust to this is beyond the imagination, which does make your parents feel helpless too, its got to be said it must be hard has hell to have a child with BPD and trying to raise them with them having distinctions in their personality. If you don’t think there is a difference between the 2 and you think its all 1 personality with just separate traits etc, then okay fair enough all id say is research BPD personality and I’m sure you’ll have an interesting read or two. Also id like to quickly say there is a giant difference from BPD (Borderline personality disorder) & (Split personality) please do NOT read on split personality if your wanting insight into BPD, although you may think there similar because of their titles they are NOT similar, yes they have similarities but doesn’t everything in life. Split personality is entirely different to BPD. I just wanted to express that because I did use language from the split personality documents earlier.

Now I’m going to give you some clinical information on BPD Personality now most of it is general BPD but it sheds some light on this topic even though they directly relate to BPD and not personality in general. Its all useful anyway.

What is BPD?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a type of personality disorder. Personality disorders are a type of mental health problem where your attitudes, beliefs and behaviours cause you longstanding problems in your life.

It’s scary. […] One moment I’m really happy and then the next I’m crying for absolutely no reason or having a go at people. People think I’m just being moody for the sake of it.

What are the symptoms of BPD?

You might be given a diagnosis of BPD if you experience at least five of the following things, and they’ve lasted for a long time or have a big impact on your daily life:

  • You feel very worried about people abandoning you, and would do anything to stop that happening.
  • You have very intense emotions that last from a few hours to a few days and can change quickly (for example, from feeling very happy and confident in the morning to feeling low and sad in the afternoon).
  • You don’t have a strong sense of who you are, and it can change depending on who you’re with.
  • You find it very hard to make and keep stable relationships.
  • You act impulsively and do things that could harm you (such as binge eating, using drugs or driving dangerously).
  • You have suicidal thoughts or self-harming behaviour.
  • You feel empty and lonely a lot of the time.
  • You get very angry, and struggle to control your anger.
  • When very stressed, sometimes you might:
    • feel paranoid
    • have psychotic experiences, such as seeing or hearing things other people don’t
    • feel numb or ‘checked out’ and not remember things properly after they’ve happened.

Because you only need to experience five of these possible symptoms to be given the diagnosis, BPD can be a very broad diagnosis and include lots of different people with very different experiences.

[For me] having BPD is like the emotional version of being a burn victim. Everything in the world hurts more than it seems to for everyone else and any ‘thick skin’ you are supposed to have just isn’t there.

What does ‘borderline’ mean?

The term ‘borderline personality disorder’ came about because in the past, doctors used to think that you could be on the borderline between psychosis and ‘neurotic mental health problems’ (an old-fashioned way of describing all other mental health problems). Mental health professionals don’t usually talk about mental health like this anymore, so if you get a diagnosis of BPD it can be hard to understand what it means.

Because of this, some people prefer to use the term emotionally unstable personality disorder (EUPD), as they feel it’s a clearer description of the experiences you might have with this diagnosis. The terms BPD and EUPD both refer to the same mental health problem – it’s your choice which term you want to use, but your doctor might use either.

Does BPD mean I have a bad personality?

If you’re given a diagnosis of BPD, it’s understandable to feel like you’re being told that who you are is ‘wrong’. But BPD does not mean that you’re a bad person, or that you have a bad personality.

We all have both positive and negative personality traits, and we all have feelings and behaviours that can be useful at times and a problem at others. But if you experience BPD, some of your feelings or behaviours might be so difficult for you to manage that they’re stopping you from living your life as you’d like to. Treatment for BPD can help you work out which thought and behaviour patterns are useful to you, and which aren’t.

When I was diagnosed I felt like I was being told my personality was broken. It’s through my friends and family’s love and support that [I’ve come to see] my personality is still mine and not broken as I’d thought.

Who can diagnose me with BPD?

You can only be diagnosed with BPD by a mental health professional, such as a psychiatrist – not by your GP. If you speak to your GP about your mental health and they think you might have BPD, they can refer you to your local community mental health team (CMHT), who will be able to assess you.

After overcoming the initial shock of the diagnosis, it is actually a blessing because now I know what I need to do to get better.

What causes BPD?

There’s no clear reason why some people develop BPD. More women are diagnosed with BPD than men, but it can affect people of all genders and backgrounds. However, most researchers think that BPD is caused by a combination of factors, such as:

  • difficult childhood and teenage experiences
  • genetic factors
  • your personality in general

Also, if you already experience some BPD symptoms, then going through a stressful time as an adult could make your symptoms worse.

How could childhood experiences cause BPD?

It’s not clear what causes BPD, but if you get this diagnosis you’re more likely than most people to have had very difficult or traumatic experiences growing up, such as:

  • chronic fear or distress
  • family instability, such as living with a parent who is an alcoholic, or who struggles to manage a mental health problem
  • sexual or physical abuse
  • neglect
  • losing a parent

If you had difficult childhood experiences like these, you might have developed certain beliefs about how people think and how relationships work, and developed certain strategies for coping, which aren’t helpful in your adult life. You might also still be struggling with feelings of anger, fear or sadness.

Because I don’t have so many memories or examples of healthy emotional behaviour or healthy relationships [in childhood] I feel totally at sea dealing with these things myself […] So when I get let down, it just reinforces my belief that the world is full of bad people who won’t be kind to you – like my parents weren’t kind to me.

Can children and young people get BPD?

It’s very hard to diagnose BPD in children and young people because your personality is still developing as you grow up. However, a psychiatrist could diagnose you with BPD while you are still a teenager if they are confident that your symptoms have gone on for long enough that there can’t be another cause.

Could BPD be genetic?

Some evidence suggests that there might be a genetic cause of BPD, because if someone in your close family has a mental health problem you might be more likely to get this diagnosis.

However, because most people grow up with one or both of their biological parents, it’s very hard to know if symptoms of BPD – like problems with relationships or coping with strong emotions – are inherited from your parents’ genes or picked up from their behaviour. Children tend to learn how to behave by observing the people around them, so if you grew up around a parent with BPD, you might have learned some unhelpful ways of acting and feeling from them.

Nobody taught me to regulate my emotions. I saw my parents and family members regularly behave in out of control ways and I thought that was normal.

id like to thank everyone who may of read todays topic. PERSONALITY. feel free to leave any feedbacks or comments.



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