What is Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

To begin il speak about my own personal opinion of what BPD is from my own personal life experience and then il speak about it according to the research and data relating to Borderline Personality Disorder.

Where i begin is perhaps the most difficult thing to do so i’l try and break it down         has best has i can. To begin BPD is very hard to be determined you have to go through many years of mismanagement before you get any progress, Because BPD has so many things that come with it, that it almost ticks every mental health box for other illness’s which evidence backing that up is the fact that 95% of people with BPD have been treated for other illness’s such has ‘Bipolar,Anti-social disorder,Manic depressive’ just to name a few, its also known that BPD is pretty much like a seed because if untreated it can and will develop into schizophrenia or even psychosis according to research, which is backed up by the fact my personal psychiatrist and Mental Health Doctor both said to me that i had got into treatment for BPD right at the critical time because i was showing the signs of schizophrenia, they had told me if i had NOT taken the help there and then within 12 months it would of developed fully, they had told me that there was real signs that i was going down that end and with only hard work i mean hard work i was able to be directed into help into therapies etc, iv personally been diagnosed with in the past and some currently with these all before they discovered i was borderline , i was given the label of Depressive, then Manic depressive, Suicidal which is has obvious has breathing if i’m fair,schizoaffective, They had done a lot of tests on me to see if i was Bipolar because i also shown signs of that but they was not that strong. 

These are just some of the things i was living with has labels before they discovered that i was Borderline, and finding this out that i was Borderline was a great thing but at the same time an awful thing. But at least i knew what i had and i knew there was a process of treatment,because in this in state of flux with my diagnosis i wasn’t able to be treated because they was not 100% certain what i had, so they couldn’t treat me accordingly, so i was left to suffer for many years.

The hardest thing about being Borderline is the fact that no body knows how to approach you or deal with you because you google it BPD and the negative things that come up are all the stigma things and that corrupts the readers views on you because they read the wrong things instantly. so trying to get family to understand is like trying to teach a goldfish to sing the opera. Its so devastating when family or close friends use phrases such has ‘Oh you Bpd is playing up’ Or ‘Oh your in 1 today’ ‘or just the blank faceless expressions on there face’ When you tell them how you feel and how or what they did to upset you. Because being Borderline your emotions are going at a rate like a so called ‘Normal persons’ rate of emotions could be 75/100 on any given day. But for us Borderlines the rate is much more like 5,000/100 ,now the math says that’s an impossibility but that’s how it is for us generally. we feel things at such a rate that your mind cannot comprehend it nor can you even begin to understand it. leaving you feeling lost and messed up, and the person on the other end can you imagine where they are if your lost how will they begin to know whats going on, its like the blind leading the blindness. 

Iv accepted my diagnosis and am able to live somewhat with it, but i still find it so hard to cope with because people’s lack of understanding just destroys me inside, because everyone is quiet ignorant to the daily fights we have to deal with, like just waking up and making a cup of tea is hard work, ignorant people will say things like ‘Oh grow up and deal with it, its life’ Or ‘Just get a job and live your life’ these kind of comments are so destroying because how a so called normal person can get up in mornings and go to work and do that for decades. we struggle at just opening our eyes, and we are told to do this impossible task without any help or understanding.  

It is quiet impossible for me to go through everything about BPD in 1 blog ,this is rather short in comparison to the entire subject.                                                                                 i’m going to list the types of Personality Disorders now.

SCHIZOTYPAL: Very shy and suspicious, few friends, bizarre views 

SCHIZOID: Flat affect, little need to be together with others, prefers doing most things alone

PARANOID: Suspicious, Uncompromising, and temperamental

ANTISOCIAL: Repeated criminal acts, ruthless, aggressive, little capacity for caregiving

BORDERLINE: Unstable relationships, Unstable emotions, Fluctuating self-image 

NARCISSISTIC: Grandiose sense of self, arrogant, lacking in empathy 

HISTRIONIC: Theatricality, Exaggerated expression of emotions, plays on sexuality, constantly draws attention to self

AVOIDANT: Anxious, inhibited in new interpersonal situations, reluctant to take personal risks, excessively fearful of criticism or ridicule 

DEPENDENT: Lack of self-confidence, goes to excessive lengths to obtain nurturance from others, constantly needs advice and reassurance from others

OBESSIVE-COMPULSIVE: Rigid and stubborn, preoccupied with order and schedules, difficulty delegating tasks to others, Perfectionist

PERSONALITY DISORDER NOT OTHERWISE SPECIFIED: Insufficient traits to meet the threshold for any one of the above personality disorders, but has several traits from many personality disorders.

Now me personally i think im SCHIZOTYPAL,SCHIZOID,PARANOID,AVOIDANT and clearly BORDERLINE. 

You can several of these or none at all in your Borderline Personality Disorder, because they all do interwind with eachother anyway. 

The next blog il be doing, will be about TRAITS something i have a lot to say about and have some success in discussing this subject in public. That will be my next blog soon, Hope this was helpful, by no means have i even stated more that 5% of BPD but iv tried to give a good taste of what it is in my 1st blog, i will be doing many many more in great great detail about BPD ,each individual issue per blog, but this is a round a bout way of getting the blog started. so hope you liked and feel free to comment anything in the comments box below. Thanks Ash

 

 

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